back to life....

i am feeling much better today.
thanks to the help and support of all of my friends. you know who you are, and i love you all!

i have been suffering from insomnia, which causes my mind to do crazy things. like think.

and, as i think about the turn of events that my life has taken, then i realize that i am much better off without him.

ok, back to reality...
three days until i take Vegas by storm!!!
i am FINALLY excited about going.
the guys were really worried that i would poop out on them and be all whiny...wah wah wah....my boyfriend left me ....wah wah wah...
anyhow, they are trying to fix me up with 'straight-jason', who is also going on the trip.
they say "whatever happens in vegas, stays in vegas!"

i went to my world class hairstylist last night for a fab new look. (which, by the way, he thinks i should call the wife and divulge everything.) he told me to get over the old-fucking-loser, and go to vegas and do everyone there!
he was exceptionally upset that this guy dumped me. he said, "i had your hair looking fabulous for this guy, and he dumped you????? what a fucking loser, you can do so much better"
i love him!
unfortunately, he won't be going with us. he and his better half are spending the weekend in ft. lauderdale.

tonight, we are making a 'dry run' to my next husbands home. we are supposed to meet up at his house saturday morning at 5:30 a.m., and he was afraid that we'd get lost. on saturday morning, his boyfriend will drop us off at the airport (saves on parking fees), and we'll catch the early flight. he is terrified of flying so far. neither of us has ever flown so far. to counter our fear, we have stocked up on the xanax, and we'll have a couple bloody's pre-flight.

tomorrow night we dine with the boys, for last minute preparations.
friday night, getting my nails done.
whew!

by the way, my very straight cousin is joining us on this trip. (the one with whom i always go to key west with)
i don't think he's ever been around any gay men. yes, i am a little concerned, but hey...they all know they are gay.
i'm sure he'll be fine.

i doubt that i will be blogging again before my trip, so stay posted for new pics!

later,
~luv

song lyric of the day (continued): "back to reality. back to the here and now."

seether

i know that i need to 'blog'. i just can't find the words. yeah right, me? speechless?

it's been a tough couple of weeks, and there is only a shimmer of light at the end of the tunnel.

the main issue weighing on my mind deals with me and my pilot. we are still together, but there are some very serious problems right now.
so serious in fact, that i am not able to air them publicly.
needless to say, it's stressful.
oh well. they say that what doesn't kill you will make you stronger. pffft!

other big issues of late...
boo is leaving tomorrow for college.
he did get accepted into his college of choice in NYC, but changed his mind (again).
fortunately, he is only (?) going to USF. which is a 3 hour drive from me.
i am having serious 'empty nest' syndrome going on.

i did pass my real estate licensing exam, so now i am a full fledged real estate associate. i have no idea where to go from here with it...

i stopped smoking on july 5th.
i started smoking august 13th.

in 2 weeks, i will be in las vegas, so that is something to look forward to.
i am going with poo & the boys.
i really need a vacation right now.
and a cigarette.

maybe i will write more later.
maybe not.

~Luv

song lyric of the day: "frail, the skin is dry and pale, the pain will never
fail...and so we go back to the remedy"